NCT Class Number 1

As I mentioned in my previous post, last week was our first NCT class. Even though we still haven't managed to move, we decided to take the classes in the Berko area in the vain hope we might be Hertfordshire residents by the time we have a toddler.

We faced the prospect of our first meeting with some sense of trepidation. We'd heard extreme stories from friends and colleagues; from those who nicknamed it the nazi child birth trust, to those who promised we'd make friends for life. Truthfully I was just hoping the other couples would be relatively normal with a reasonable sense of humour. And, from first impressions, this is what we have got, though what others think of us Griffiths ... I'm unsure.

There is an inherent weirdness to the classes in that you are defined entirely by your bump. I cannot tell you the vocations or any other such 'normal' info that you would usually elicit from such a gathering. Much like any course the first ice breaker exercise was telling the group something about yourselves, which also involved A4 paper and marker pens. You had to give your names (pretty easy) and say when your baby is due (again, straightforward) and then provide two 'interesting' facts about your baby...This was actually quite difficult - what can you say about your unborn baby who is currently cocooned away from you for 9 months? We were at the furthest edge of the circle so had to wait our turn patiently whilst we learned the sexes of many of the other bumps, as well as those that had short legs, long legs and seemingly inadequate torsos. Clearly the Archway scanners are inferior to the Herts ones as we had no such info to impart. Plus we don't know the sex of bump yet. So we (I) opted for comedy factoids: 1) baby g has alien tendencies (see previous post) and 2) it will be an Evertonian. Fact 2 was met with stunned silence, followed by question from Course Leader as to whether or not we'd already bought bump a kit. Categorically not. Hmmm. As husband psstd in my ear 'told you not to go with that one'.

I'm also a tad concerned that I might have come across as a bit dismissive of one of the other lady's situations and thereby cast myself as the outspoken member of the group. Situation 1: there is a breech bump in the group. We were discussing ways you can help baby move into the right position. I found myself saying that I'd always slept on my left and my baby is on my left (i.e. where ideally it should be) which I fear came across as smug to the struggling lady who looked like this is greatly concerning her. Situation 2: to try and atone for Situation 1 in a wider discussion about breech births I added to the chatter that my mum had given birth to a breech baby naturally. And that she was the first of a pair of twins. And that they were over 8lbs. Each. This was meant to be reassuring. But again, I think I came off as mostly smug. Oh dear.

So tomorrow night will try to bite my tongue in vain hope of recovering from last week's performance and the ladies can see I'm not a bitch, rather someone with, seemingly, poor social graces, but a good heart. Well, you can but hope.